“Every time you feel yourself being pulled into other people’s drama, repeat these word: Not my circus, not my monkeys.” – Polish Proverb
In my last article, we explored some basics qualities of Extreme Meetings. We illuminated a pathway towards _always_ including a focus on sustainability and a healthier future during your business planning. It’s become almost obvious that, in most business sectors, leaders have realized: What’s good for the planet is almost always very good for the bottom line as well.
That fact leads us to ask: As leaders, how do we optimize results, when the team’s collective endeavor is so often corrupted by negative behaviors? To answer this question, a great place to start is to teach leaders how to predict, design for, and manage Extreme Meetings. What is an Extreme Meeting? You can tell you are sitting in an Extreme Meeting when:
- Trust is low
- Stakes are high, and
- Emotions dominate
Simple, right? We’ve all been there. If you enter a room and the above conditions are present, you’re almost sure to exit that room feeling worse than when you entered it. You will almost certainly experience tons of stress. You will almost certainly experience dissatisfying meeting results.
It takes a scientific approach to unlock the full potential of your teams. As The Meeting Guy, we offer “The Art and Science of Meetings” because when working with complex, powerful people, leadership effectiveness requires a facility with a comprehensive set of variables. Some are more structural and scientific; some of more emotionally intelligent and artistic.
For example, here are the “NVC : The Effective Leader’s Five Primary Steps”. Non Violent Communication is a simple, powerful tool you can use, starting NOW, which will help you generate more meeting productivity for your teams. In this case, the Five steps are intended to be applied inwardly; that is, organizational transformation happens when the organizations leaders are committed to their own personal transformation. The five steps below require, literally, about 30 seconds on introspection. Do you have 30 seconds to spend on exponentially improved meeting results?
NVC: The Effective Leader’s Five Primary Steps
- Stop and breath
- Identify judgements
- Identify needs
- Empathize with the other person
- Express unmet needs
When and if we work together, I will train you to thoroughly extract optimal value from each of those five steps.
The good news is: There is so much more to learn! Before I step in front of a room, I exercise the Five Steps, and allow myself to sink deeply into my calm, effective, optimal leadership modality.
Once I have achieved that state, I am ready and willing to be willing to be ready. Huh? Awww.. let me just show you the “Nine Be Wiling To’”;
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The Nine Be Willing To’s are some of the most important ways to effectively lead your team as they head into an Extreme Meeting. This list is ontological in nature, and describes a state of being grounded in highest-order service:
- Be willing to trust your intuition
- Be willing to remain extraordinarily grounded, calm, and present
- Be willing to adjust the agenda in real time, with the group as witness
- Be willing to describe elephants in the room, obvious polarities and paradoxes
- Be willing to demand that the team is completely clear on its’ intended results for the meeting
- Be willing to embrace tension in the room as the team’s absolute best quality
- Be willing to personally grow, in real time, with the group as witness
- Be willing to professionally grow, in real time, with the group as witness
And finally, if it’s true for you…
- Be willing to proclaim the group’s work as an example of good work in the world; work of the highest order and possibility; work which contributes to highest local and global good will
When you achieve mastery with the Five Primary Steps and the Nine Be Willing To’s, you will have taken massive ground on the way to producing optimal results, even in the conditions of an Extreme Meeting.
Let’s DO this thing called INTEGRITY!